Tuesday, 2 June 2015

The awkward, creeping horror.... Is OK actually.

After last week's horrible bleedin' racket this week's blog reading music is Bliss by Tori Amos.  I've been a fan of Tori's for donkey's years and think it's a shame that a lot of people only remember her for one huge hit single in the 90s.

Temples was awesome  \m/
After the weekend I just had at Temples Festival in Bristol I need something a bit gentle too. Temples is an extreme metal festival and a great weekend was had but aside from getting up and doing yoga and pushups before the drinking began Jesus did I fall off the wagon with the boozing and being a music festival food choices were exclusively brown.  As a matter of fact falling off the wagon seems to be a bit of a theme in recent weeks but each time with a different attitude, and it's the attitude that really effects how I'm going to deal with this going forward.  The first week was that I was being lazy, just slacking on the whole health and fitness thing and slipping back into old habits, by far the worst by far, the week after that I had a concious decision to have a day off over the weekend and this last week I've just had a load of socialising to do and although it was hardly the most clean living week I had a great time doing it and actually found a benefit in other ways.

12 Rounds representing at the Clapham Grand.
So last week, yoga, one strength & conditioning session and that was it, evenings and the weekend were fully booked and I just let myself off the chain a bit.  Wednesday was a Nintendo based quiz night in Stoke Newington (beers), Thursday was a boxing event at the Clapham Grand where we had 7 fighters from 12 Rounds on the card who went 6 wins, 0 loss & 1 draw on the night, (celebratory beers) and then Friday to Monday was Temples (ungodly amount of beers).  Huge respect to Kate, Rachael, Daniel, Ludo, Will, Tom, Joel who got in the ring representing 12 Rounds and to Kat, John & Kirk for working the corner. Great performances all around and I'm so inspired to get in there myself, watch this space!  That's hopefully the future but as working out and diet goes it's pretty much a write off for me this last week, but I've had the chance to work on something else instead.

If you've been reading for a while you'll know that I suffer from social anxiety. I can get really uncomfortable in social situations, especially when I don't have someone or something to latch onto and this has been known to work itself into full-on panic-attack mode in the past, give me a night out with one or two close friends and I'm happy but too much beyond that comfort zone and I'm a state, or at least that's always been the case.  The night out for the fights was the kind of night I used to absolutely dread - loads of people, most of whom I only knew in passing milling about and making small talk but I had a great night.  It helps that pretty much everyone who trains at 12 Rounds is a sweetheart but in the time since I started this blog and started getting my arse into shape I've got so much better at this kind of thing, it shouldn't be surprising to someone looking in from the outside but I've been amazed at how much getting myself healthier has effected how much more confident I am and how much more positively I interact with the world around me.  As for Temples, that was a whole other level, I don't have a lot of friends who are into the same kind of music as me and was invited along on Facebook by someone I've kinda known for years but who's never been a mate, he invited me months back along with 6 other guys all to stay in an apartment together, I agreed but was frankly terrified by the prospect....   3 days with 6 strangers and one person I kinda knew?  Absolute horror.  But at the time it was booked I knew this whole social problem was something I was trying to work on and and I knew if it was a trip I committed to it would be something I had to work on even more, nothing like terror for motivation eh?  Turns out I spent the weekend with a nice bunch of chaps and the occasional moment aside the old creeping terror hardly raised it's ugly head at all and the only social weirdness I took part in was being an absolute drunken buffoon...  y'know, like a normal person.

So I'm home, feeling happy with the fact that I seem to be doing better at being a person, I'm seriously craving some vegetables, I'm sworn off the booze for the time being, my diary is full of almost nothing but booked gym sessions and yoga and I'm feeling like I'm going to do better than ever this summer.

Just as soon as this hangover wears off.

Oh, I missed you.  I won't go away again for a long time.
Thanks for reading.  Here's some baby goats wearing jumpers and a shark who loves a belly rub.

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